These twists and turns.

john1_5

photo cred: rickandridgephotography

It’s such a long time since I wrote.

I got lost in all of it, in life and going by the motions.

I wish I could say I’ve got it together, I mean after all this time I should have something together, right?

But, this being a christian thing, the whole being human thing. It’s hard. Individually hard and then you  put them together and it’s a whole new set of challenges.

I know a lot of people who seem to have it down. The whole living by faith thing, and career thing. I know appearances are deceiving especially in this world we live in today with photoshop and looking good for the cameras.

It’s really frustrating though, so I come here and I read something I wrote, and the pain I’ve been in before and remember that it all passes and it’ll be okay. It has to be okay. So I stop comparing myself to other people, and how far they appear to have come, or how strong their faith looks compared to mine.

But, it’s still really difficult sometimes living the day by day. On days like today when i’m feeling empty, feeling lost, feeling disconnected, and weak in faith.

He says joy comes in the morning, He says all things work together for my good, so I have to believe it will all be okay.

It’s hard, it really is, and if i’m completely honest, I may not make it easy for myself sometimes but i’m trying.

 

God, help me live by faith. Give me the strength and wisdom to walk the path and trust You have it all under control. Amen.

 

Mope much?

In my moments of woe is me, I came across the verses quoted below. God has a sense of humor. There’s nothing i’m more certain of than that. I have been questioning a lot of my life over and over, trying to figure out why?! but, I am now reminded of all the other times God has come through for me, in small ways, and big ways but still I question Him.

But who are you, O man, to answer back to God? Will what is molded say to its molder, “Why have you made me like this?” Has the potter no right over the clay, to make out of the same lump one vessel for honorable use and another for dishonorable use? What if God, desiring to show his wrath and to make known his power, has endured with much patience vessels of wrath prepared for destruction, in order to make known the riches of his glory for vessels of mercy, which he has prepared beforehand for glory—even us whom he has called, not from the Jews only but also from the Gentiles? As indeed he says in Hosea, “Those who were not my people I will call ‘my people,’ and her who was not beloved I will call ‘beloved.’”

(Romans 9:20-25 ESV)

 

God is good, He has promised that He has it all planned out of our good, so why should we sit around and mop about all the things that are not working out? He is God, He created us, He has it all under control. So chill, breathe and enjoy the positive. Give the best you can in everything you have and stop focusing on everything that’s not working.

He has it covered.

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.

(John 14:27 ESV)

May my heart one day dance.

I had not realized just how long it has been since I was on this page. I took a little break. To be honest I chose a path that had me spiraling toward the opposite direction. It all worked out for my good as He has promised, but my life is hardly perfect.

It’s very hard to believe everything the bible says about our life sometimes. I understand that the bible doesn’t promise a perfect happy life, but I don’t remember a part where it says I have to drown in darkness and pain for months, come out out triumphant only to be thrown back deeper. I walk around life with joy, gladness, a smile permanently plastered on my face, but my heart is far from what the world perceives my life to be.

I am grateful for the life I have been given. Grateful for person I am, I am not complaining. I just wish I could be filled with exuberance.

I want my heart to dance.

joyofthelord

My center.

It’s been an awesome week, I sadly haven’t had the opportunity to post a blog but honestly this post is all my week has been about. Actually, this song that I’ve posed is all my week has been out. Every morning I’ve woken up singing it, and it has really spoken to me. Helped me reevaluate things and just gotten me in full worship mode all day, everyday this week. It’s been amazing. I hope it blesses you like it does me.

Jesus be the center of it all, this is my prayer.

Jesus at the center of it all
Jesus at the center of it all
From beginning to the end
It will always be
It’s always been You
Jesus, Jesus

Nothing else matters
Nothing in this world will do
Jesus You’re the center
Everything revolves around You
Jesus You
At the center of it all

Jesus be the center of my life
Jesus be the center of my life
From beginning to the end
It will always be
It’s always been You
Jesus, Jesus

Nothing else matters
Nothing in this world will do
Jesus You’re the center
Everything revolves around You
Jesus You

Nothing else matters
Nothing in this world will do
Jesus You’re the center
Everything revolves around You
Jesus You

From my heart to the heavens
Jesus be the center
It’s all about You
Yes it’s all about You

Jesus be the center of Your church
Jesus be the center of Your church
And every knee will bow
And every tongue confess You

Jesus, Jesus

From my heart to the heavens
Jesus be the center
It’s all about You
Yes it’s all about You

From my heart to the heavens, Jesus be the center! It’s all about you.

Madly inlove.

What is love?

Have you any clue? Can you really describe it, explain it in a way that a child would understand?

Do you really know love?

This here *pointing to the chapter below* that is love.

    O LORD, you have searched me and known me!
    You know when I sit down and when I rise up;
        you discern my thoughts from afar.
    You search out my path and my lying down
        and are acquainted with all my ways.
    Even before a word is on my tongue,
        behold, O LORD, you know it altogether.
    You hem me in, behind and before,
        and lay your hand upon me.
    Such knowledge is too wonderful for me;
        it is high; I cannot attain it.
    Where shall I go from your Spirit?
        Or where shall I flee from your presence?
    If I ascend to heaven, you are there!
        If I make my bed in Sheol, you are there!
    If I take the wings of the morning
        and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea,
    even there your hand shall lead me,
        and your right hand shall hold me.
    If I say, “Surely the darkness shall cover me,
        and the light about me be night,”
    even the darkness is not dark to you;
        the night is bright as the day,
        for darkness is as light with you.
    For you formed my inward parts;
        you knitted me together in my mother’s womb.
    I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
    Wonderful are your works;
        my soul knows it very well.
    My frame was not hidden from you,
    when I was being made in secret,
        intricately woven in the depths of the earth.
    Your eyes saw my unformed substance;
    in your book were written, every one of them,
        the days that were formed for me,
        when as yet there was none of them.
    How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!
        How vast is the sum of them!
    If I would count them, they are more than the sand.
        I awake, and I am still with you.
    Oh that you would slay the wicked, O God!
        O men of blood, depart from me!
    They speak against you with malicious intent;
        your enemies take your name in vain.
    Do I not hate those who hate you, O LORD?
        And do I not loathe those who rise up against you?
    I hate them with complete hatred;
        I count them my enemies.
    Search me, O God, and know my heart!
        Try me and know my thoughts!
    And see if there be any grievous way in me,
        and lead me in the way everlasting!
(Psalm 139 ESV)

Reading that just made me smile.

All other relationships may be mucky and dirty.

Boyfriends/girlfriends may be unfaithful.

The world may fail us, they may lie and cheat and tear our hearts out of our chests.

but His relationship with us, His love for us. It’s unconditional.

He will always remain faithful, He has never and will never break His vows/covenant with us.

His love is like nothing we have experienced here on earth.

It jaw dropping.

It’s breathtaking.

It’s beautiful.

and I am so madly in love with Him.

If like me you need a pick me up.

Hebrews 13:5 Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”

 

Genesis 28:15 I am with you and will watch over you wherever you go, and I will bring you back to this land. I will not leave you until I have done what I have promised you.”

 

Deuteronomy 4:31 For the LORD your God is a merciful God; he will not abandon or destroy you or forget the covenant with your forefathers, which he confirmed to them by oath.

 

Psalm 37:25 I was young and now I am old, yet I have never seen the righteous forsaken or their children begging bread.

 

Deuteronomy 31:8 The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”

Unforgivable.. huh!

Can you lose your salvation?  I constantly hear stories of Christians backsliding losing their faith..  A lot of time it’s characterized by falling into  sin once or twice or even completely leaving the church. I dunno, maybe it’s just me and my interpretation of the bible that’s flawed. but, I don’t think a person can lose their salvation. I imagine that when He says my grace is sufficient He means it’s sufficient in every single circumstance. People act crazy, when a person has done some sin they consider grand and unforgivable. But, there really is no unforgivable sin(well, there is. And it’s only one – ask me for the verse and I’ll give it to you). Anyway, God has grace that can’t be measured. It’s incredibly vast, yet we always seem to want to quantify it into some human amount which, remembering that we are like a drop in an ocean to God is just completely ridiculous.

So can you lose your salvation? If you’ve gone really far down and out. According to my understanding, No. You cannot go too far that God can’t reach you. But, if you claim to know Him you must live like He did. So we can’t claim to know salvation and live a life opposite of the way Christ lived now can we?

In terms of losing our salvation, I guess that one is for discussion. What do you think?

His amazing love.

This weeks scripture is one of my favorite scriptures. It’s all about His love this week. If you are like me, then you need some reminding once in awhile about how much He actually loves you. This great big God has His great big love directed towards us. That’s the best thing to think about this week. His amazing love.

    The LORD works righteousness
and justice for all who are oppressed.
He made known his ways to Moses,
his acts to the people of Israel.
The LORD is merciful and gracious,
slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love.
He will not always chide,
nor will he keep his anger forever.
He does not deal with us according to our sins,
nor repay us according to our iniquities.
For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him;
as far as the east is from the west,
so far does he remove our transgressions from us.
As a father shows compassion to his children,
so the LORD shows compassion to those who fear him.
(Psalm 103:6-13 ESV)

He loves Us!

Kim Kardashian inspired me

I’ve written about Kim before, I think it was last year or early this year when she had done something(can’t remember what) and everyone had an opinion about it/her. So again I have something to say, not that I’ve heard or seen anything about her that I feel I need to defend or anything, I just thought of her and felt very inspired. I know a lot of you read that and were really puzzled. Well, keep reading. People have this opinion of her that is nothing close to inspiring. But, as much as I may not exactly follow her shows or her life, I am online a lot and I cannot prevent myself from seeing aspects of her life that are always being publicized(mostly negative sadly).
In spite of all that negative talk about her though, this lady keeps on living her life the way she wants to live it. You can say whatever you want about about Kim Kardashian, but you cannot deny that she’s focused. Every new story, every negative, she picks it and spins it to her advantage. The girl works hard. Her whole life is a job and she knows it, showing us what we want to see. I may not want to live her life -mostly because that publicity is ridiculous- but honestly, I think it takes way too much energy and I wasn’t born to work that hard.. *Smiley face* but I would love if I had that much passion towards my dreams and goals. The ability to take the negative and use it to my advantage. That’s inspiring.If we could all live our live with that tenacity towards our faith, our passions, our lives. It would be incredible.

We all need to be a little bit stubborn when it comes to living the life we dream of. Refuse to bend to public opinion. Choose to be ourselves. No imitation. When it comes to her personal life, I really have no clue. I don’t know how she truly is on the inside, I don’t know what she believes, and it’s not my job to know. It’s not my job to judge her either. Her life choices are her own, guided by her thoughts, her heart and whoever advises her and I will not judge her choices. It’s very easy to sit on my couch watching some entertainment news nonsense and form an opinion based on someone else’s imagined summary of a celebrity’s life. But, I am not here to live the easy life. I’m here to represent Christ and Christ sees the heart, and He shows love, and grace. Plus, I’ve mucked my life up pretty good with some choices I’ve made and it would be extremely ridiculous to judge someone when my own faults are staring at me. So I will only speak about her public life, what I see. What she shows us, and that is bravery and a whole lot of crazy hard work. She is always selling something, it may not be obvious, but she is always marketing, making money, achieving some goal. Be it online or when she’s out and about. And that is something to admire.

So the motivation for today, and the week ahead. Don’t lose focus on the dream. Push forward, have faith and mute all the negative talk. You’ll get there.

I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”
(John 16:33 ESV)