We all have those days/nights when you just want someone. Some companionship, tonight is one of those for me. I was going to go a whole different route with tonights post but I got completely overwhelmed by this “loneliness” cloud hovering over me.Yep, I’m single, like a baobab tree in the middle of the desert, single, very single. That little factor seems more apparent to me tonight more than any other night. *sigh* I should probably also add the fact that I’ve been single for about two year now.. haha! No, there’s nothing wrong with me.
I am a very choosy human. Yeah, figure that’s a good place to start.
I’m choosy, very choosy in fact about everything! From the food I eat, to the table I sit at, at the restaurant, to just about anything (watches as any man who would have been interested in me runs away). So obviously same goes for friendships and the men in my life.
We’re always told not to judge a potential boyfriend/girlfriend by our past experiences but honestly that’s not only impossible but stupid. No, I will not assume you’ll be violent or unfaithful but I will also not walk blindly into anything without thinking it out. I’m one of those who believe that love is intended before it’s spontaneous. I don’t think a single person can actually say they met someone and fell madly in-love the moment they saw them and got married and have been married for 60years. If those exist then they must be very few and very blessed with such a wonderful anomaly.The rest continue on to discover what they saw was just a facade or that the persons personality is completely opposite what they were looking for.
Me, I choose to use logic. I don’t exactly have a list of what a man should have I just have a list of what he shouldn’t. Deal breakers for me; smoking is a NO for me, I don’t smoke (I’ve had a lot of friends who smoke, and the temptation for a toke is too high), I have a lot of alcoholics dead beats in my family so you can guess what my opinion on drinking is. I drank in college and that was that – a stupid phase- I’m not saying everyone that drinks is irresponsible, I’ve just been exposed to too many of that type and I’m done with that. and, of course the man has to love and respect his momma and sisters and protect them always. Finally and most important with God as his foundation I can’t go wrong, so he has to love God with all he’s got.
With all my wonderful reasoning and all my knowledge, at times like this I just want anything. I won’t go out looking or anything like that but if it fell through my roof well.. Haha! Thankfully men do not fall through roofs, so all I have to worry about is lonely nights wishing I had what I don’t. For now till the day God sends my chosen spouse, I shall be single and lonely, but patiently waiting.